Drive Until You Lose The Road
by take risks
Summary: “I can’t live this life without you in it.” Hermione meets Draco at a café for the last time before they take different paths. Songfic based on How To Save A Life by The Fray. HGDM.
1. Chapter 1

**Drive Until You Lose The Road by ****take risks**

Songfic: How To Save A Life by The Fray. 

Hermione can't live without him. Draco would die for her.

* * *

Hermione pushed the quill from her hand onto the table. Drawing in a sigh of apprehension she pulled the owl from its perch on her desk and tied the parchment to its claws. The owl squawked and soared off from her outstretched arm and into the busy, humming corridor outside Hermione's office.

Hermione looked over to her left, the empty desk was like a stab wound that reopened every time she looked at it. But she couldn't stop looking at the desk, because then he would really be gone.

Tears filled her eyes as the pile of paperwork still sat in a pile, the same as he had left it a week ago. All the odd bits and pieces he collected sat around the desk, moving or making weird noises.

He had tried to explain what they were, and what they did, but had laughed at him throughout his explanation of the small orange square that lit up whenever she entered the room. He had stubbornly refused to try and show her anymore.

Hermione choked through her sobs, as the dry laughter burnt her throat. In the five years she had called him best friend, no matter the situation, he had always made her laugh.

'Miss Granger?'

Hermione looked up at the voice.

'An owl has arrived for you. You asked me to remind you that you have a meeting with the Minister at two.'

Hermione nodded at the secretary, taking the letter the owl had just delivered. Holding the letter in her lap, Hermione heard the door snap close after the secretary left. Her heart was pounding as she smoothed a hand over the outer edge of the rolled up parchment.

Pulling the letter open, Hermione recognised the letter she had just sent.

_Draco,_

_Please meet me at the Cauldron Café at six-thirty tonight._

_Hermione. _

The Cauldron Café. Hermione and Draco had been to that café more times than she had read _Hogwarts: A History_, and that was a lot. It was only a block away from Hermione's apartment, and Draco had apparated over almost every night to spend the evening with her.

_I'll be there._

Hermione sighed at his response, she didn't know if she was happy he had accepted, or scared.

* * *

Hermione walked into the Cauldron Café at six-thirty and threaded her way over to the booth they had always sat at. The booth was empty, so Hermione sat down and stared blankly across at the seat where his head should have been.

The door of the café chimed as it was pushed open and a strong winter gust blew around the café.

Draco Malfoy had come.

Hermione smiled hesitantly at him from across the room as Draco walked over. She tried to get her thoughts in order, and found for the first time in her life, her mind had blanked.

Draco reached the table and stood above her, his face was expressionless.

'Sit down. It's just a talk,' Hermione told him, watching as Draco slid into the seat facing her.

A small, polite but unfamiliar smile graced Draco's face as Hermione stared politely back at him, her stomach in knots.

**_Step one you say we need to talk  
He walks you say sit down it's just a talk  
He smiles politely back at you  
You stare politely right on through_**

Seeing his face brought back so many memories, that it hurt Hermione, and tears began to fill her eyes once more. Blinking them back, she focused on the waiting Draco.

'Draco, we need to talk this over.'

'There's nothing to talk about. We've said everything we need to say.'

Hermione closed her eyes in unhappiness. She wanted to fix things, he wanted to leave them.

Anger seized Hermione. _It was his fault all of this was happening!_

Hermione stared at Draco, wondering why either of them came. They both knew that they would act this way, one wanting one thing, the other wanting something else. It was how it had always been, even before they had become friends, before they were even working together.

_**Some sort of window to your right  
As he goes left and you stay right  
Between the lines of fear and blame  
You begin to wonder why you came**_

Hermione closed her eyes, a feeling of hopelessness and despair washed over her. She didn't know what to say to make it right, but she wanted - no, she needed - things to go back to how they were.

Hermione studied Draco's expressionless face. There had been a time when Draco was most relaxed around Hermione, when he had never felt the need to mask the feelings he felt. Hermione felt sick at Draco's vacant face, it was taunting her, making her regret her discission, even though it had been the right one for her at the time.

If only she had understood what he was trying to say from the start! If only he had made it clear!

But he hadn't. Hermione supposed that had added to the mess of the situation.

_**Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend  
Somewhere along in the bitterness  
And I would have stayed up with you all night  
Had I known how to save a life**_

'Draco…' Hermione started.

Draco stared at her, his eyes slightly questioning.

'I know myself better than anyone. This is the way I feel, and for that I'm sorry. Draco, you're my best friend-'

'What about Potter and Weasley?'

'They are too. Just, please, don't let this come between us. Don't let this ruin everything.'

'Hermione, it's too late.' Draco said, still straight-faced. 'I don't want things like this either, but I can't face you anymore. It hurts too much. Maybe in a year things will be different… I have to try and move on, and if you're there all the time, I can't do that.'

'If you really cared about me, you would stop this, because it's hurting me as well!' Hermione yelled at him.

_**Let him know that you know best  
Cause after all you do know best  
Try to slip past his defence  
Without granting innocence**_

Draco's eye narrowed.

'Draco, I'm sorry.' Hermione said, pulling forth the mental list she had been going over for the past week. 'When you told me that you- well, when you told me, I was scared. I didn't know how react, and because of that, I reacted badly, but so did you. Everything was just fine and then you said those words and … Merlin, I can't live this life without you in it Draco. I need you like I need oxygen. Last week was the hardest week of my life, and it was because you weren't in it. Draco, without you I am nothing.'

Hermione let the tears she had held at bay silently trickle down her face as she watched Draco, waiting, praying for him to understand.

**_Lay down a list of what is wrong  
The things you've told him all along  
And pray to God he hears you  
And pray to God he hears you_**

'You don't understand!' Draco yelled at her, finally losing it. 'Hermione, you say you can't live without me, but the way I feel now is worse than dead.'

'Draco I-'

'No, Hermione, listen. I love you. That's the way I feel, even if you don't love me back. Knowing that you will never return the same feelings, knowing that someday when you find someone, I won't be the one you turn to first when things get hard. Knowing that I can never wake up to your face every morning for the rest of my life. It hurts too much.' Draco kept his voice raised, ignoring the strange looks he was receiving from several of the customers. 'I think about how you feel more than I do myself, and I can't keep living my life this way. I can't be around you, be your friend without it hurting. You say you need me, but I have to learn not to need you. So don't you dare try to make me feel guilty.'

'Draco, I'm not trying to make you feel guilty,' Hermione whispered. 'Are you going to continue not talking to me, even if that means losing me forever? Or will you come back to work, forgive me for saying what I said, and forgive yourself?'

**_As he begins to raise his voice  
You lower yours and grant him one last choice  
Drive until you lose the road  
Or break with the ones you've followed_**

Draco stared at Hermione, broken hearted. He stood slowly, rising up from the booth and collecting his jacket, which he folded up in his arms.

Hermione watched him, quickly swatting the tears from her eyes, waiting. Would he tell her, or would he leave her? She stood up to face him and watched in apprehension as Draco fought with his feelings.

_**He will do one of two things  
He will admit to everything  
Or he'll say he's just not the same  
And you'll begin to wonder why you came**_

Looking at Hermione one last time, Draco whispered, 'I can't come back to you.'

Hermione closed her eyes and dropped back onto her seat as her body racked with emotion and tears poured down her face.

Draco walked away from Hermione, leaving her sobbing at the table. He reached the door and pulled it open, feeling his own heart breaking; again. Draco Malfoy stepped out onto the sidewalk, feeling empty and lost as the icy wind tore at his face.

* * *

**I'll write a sequel if enough people request one... **I felt torn between leaving the story there or continuing. Let me know.


	2. Chapter 2

WOW!

Thanks everyone for your support and encouragement.

I decided to write a sequel, because most of you guys wanted a happy ending.

To be honest, I was surprised with where it ended up, it wasn't what I was planning from the start.

If anyone is happy with the current ending, and feels it has closure, then don't read the sequel lol.

Thanks for reading and reviewing, you guys are the best :)

Check out the sequel: **Now That I Don't Hear Your Voice **

xx


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